March 6, 2006

• I know that an update has been long overdue. I’ve been trying to get around to doing so for the past week/week and a half. Lots of interesting stuff.

  So much to say…I think I’ll let this one be a stream of consciousness. That way I’ll cover all the bases. Everyone tells me that my blog is scattered anyway, so what the hell, eh? Speaking of my blog, has anyone noticed that I haven’t used as many inline headings? Don’t know why that’s so, but it is so. So deal.

  I wonder how many people I’ve pissed of with my blog to the point of they just don’t read it anymore. Frankly, I don’t care. I’m passed caring. You’ve only got one life to live and I’m not about to be held back by someone else being offended by what I write. This is the internet, the one and only place we are allowed true free expression and by God, I’m gonna express my happy ass exactly as how I see fit. So again, deal.

  Midterms
  A good friend of mine is having three or four this week and one more next week. Good luck lulu. While also on the subject, there’s a girl that works at an academic institution here in town that I’ve taken a likening to. Intelligent, social girl, I must say. I’ve come to the edge of the precipice of asking her for her number several times, but considering the fact that I’d be on the clock doing so and that I still have to see her several times a week to do my job, that might not be the best move. Besides, we don’t really know each other. Perhaps I am too much of a pansy.

  Had a talk about this very subject with a friend the other day. It’s a vicious cycle. You want a girl that you can pour all of yourself into so bad, but then you never make a move because you figure that either she’s with someone right now or has just gotten out of a bad relationship and doesn’t want to be with guys period i.e. borderline lesbianism. So you never ask. And you never get. And you become more depressed. Maybe it’s just due to the fact that you don’t want to be hurt again. Maybe it’s because you don’t know how to play the game and just want to skip straight to the passionate “I’m madly in love with you love/life is an adventure/where will this day take us?” Love takes time. Humans take time. Time is a valuable commodity these days. That’s why we use computers. Make more time by doing more work in fractions of what it would take to do so manually.

  Speaking of manuals, I love my 5 speed.

  Heard through the grapevine that Dr. Franks broke his leg…sources say it was ice skating, I believe it was the skiing trip. Would have called. Should have called. But I didn’t. I didn’t call on Mom’s birthday and I didn’t call on their anniversary. It’s apparent they don’t want me to be part of their family, so why harass them? I mean, after all, if they really cared or thought that I cared, they would have called and told me about this if it were true. Would I have been sympathetic? Probably not. But I would have had the choice to be. I don’t even know if they know about the car. Haven’t called or commented. Thought about deleting their numbers out of my phone. That would be vindictive. But they never call. The only one that did is my sister, and even then we didn’t have that great of conversations.

  I never connected with anyone in that family. It was too competitive. No one cared. We were all selfish. All I wanted was to hear Dad say that he’s proud of me. But all I do is let him down. If he only knew half the shit I’ve gotten into. And I never connected with my sister either. There was too much sexual tension in the house. Maybe that’s why I don’t get along with women. I won’t even touch a girl. Too uncomfortable. Makes me feel evil. Rotten life. Couple that with severe BDSM tendencies and you have one hell of a mix.

  I feel like I’m Nick Cage’s character in The Weather Man.

  Dave Spritz

  (v.o.)

  What must you think of me? You’re family-leaver. Your non-meteroligist, yet weatherman frosty-taking fuck-happy son. Don’t die yet Robert. Give me time to get it together. Give me a little while. Let me get the Hello America job. I can get it together.”

  But I know that I won’t. But I won’t settle either. That’s why I’m going to go on and make my millions. Live the American dream. God I should be writing scripts instead of this bullshit.

  Dave Spritz

  (v.o.)

  My mom discovered an idea known as a living funeral in a book she read to help her with Robert dying. It’s where somone’s family and friends gather like they might at the person’s funeral only when the person’s alive, so they can see everybody.

  When I think of my dad, I think of Bob Segear’s Like a Rock.

  (v.o.)

  and then the power went out. Then, when the lights came back on in 40 minutes, everyone had pretty much forgotten that I was talking and we never finished that part of the thing. So my speech was, “When I think of my Dad, I think of Bob Seager’s Like a Rock.” That’s all I said at my dad’s living funeral…something about Bob Seager.

  Alright, well enough of that. There’s so much more I want/need to say, but I’m waay late for going to Monevallo to hang with Timon for his B-day. We’re going out to eat (don’t know where yet) and then hopefully we’ll catch a showing of Freedomland. Someone remind me to update on the whole “dating” thing. And if you have any questions (this one’s really for you Eric,) just ask and I’ll answer. Oh yeah, someone needs to tell me to talk about Big Cove and work too.

  • 3:32 pm
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