April 22, 2009
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Urf Day
This is a message from Uncle Al:
Today is Earth Day, a day that we raise awareness of the dangers of American consumerism. Today, I would like you to ask your boss to turn off all the electricity in the building to lower your company’s carbon footprint.
Send Google
an emaila messenger pigeon asking them to turn their servers off. Suggest that those sites who refuse to loose traffic to their SEO websites could purchase offsets from sites who agree to no longer be searched.Stop wearing non-hemp clothing. Those designer jeans are made by slaves in factories in third world countries. Those factories are owned by evil American corporations who exist only to pollute and make their CEOs get richer without sharing those profits equally with their workers. And when you wear things like leather or fur, we all know that it takes even more manufacturing and kill cute animals, bovine flatulence aside. If hemp just isn’t your style, consider becoming an nudist instead.
Call the ISP of blogging corporations such as Xanga who allow Conservatives like trunthepaige and professortom to spew their rhetoric into the
blogasphereatmosphere which causes temperatures to rise almost 100 degrees Celsius in the immediate vicinities where their blogs are read.Finally, write your Senator and Congressperson and urge them to quit subsidizing the automotive and aerospace industries. From manufacture to use of their products, these industries combined put more CO2 in the air than all aerosol spray cans in existence.
Comments (14)
Al Gore is so annoying. I do like the idea of turning off all the electricity at work, though. Then no one would have to drive to work, which would save energy; and everyone would get the day off, which would make Earth Day a popular holiday by default. That is freaking brilliant.
@heidenkind – Uncle Al is no idiot.
I’ll get right on that, Comrade Gore
@firetyger – Atta Girl!
I got to rec it I’m in it
@trunthepaige – YAY!!!
Of all the talking heads, I think he remains my favorite. He’s my inspiration for increasing my carbon footprint.
@DirtyAndShaken – Think of the whales!
@heidenkind - Yes, very brilliant indeed.
Awesome Al Gore themed avatar, by the way. It is funny.
But the purposed of my life is to bring about the end of existence as we know it! Don’t you know about chaos magic? I was born to be the opposite of the big bang.
@treelights – Thank you. I try to use only the best, most communicative avatars out there.
@BenjiRucas – Next time, you need to take more people with you when you commit Xangacide.
Oh Gorey-poo.